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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27563329">The Future</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Castiel_Left_His_Mark_On_Me/pseuds/Castiel_Left_His_Mark_On_Me'>Castiel_Left_His_Mark_On_Me</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Destiel Feels [21]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>15x20, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, Canon Universe, Castiel in the Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), Emotional, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, Feels, First Kiss, Hope, Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt/Comfort, Love, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), Meta, Miracles, Post 15x19, Season/Series 15 Spoilers, Series Finale</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 03:34:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,820</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27563329</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Castiel_Left_His_Mark_On_Me/pseuds/Castiel_Left_His_Mark_On_Me</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Chuck is gone, the world is saved, but something is still missing ... <i>someone</i> is still missing, and Dean doesn't know if he'll ever find peace with that.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Destiel Feels [21]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/218576</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>464</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>SPN Finale "Destiel is CANON" Collection</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Future</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>These are my thoughts, after SPN 15x19 aired, of how the final episode might look (or more, this is how I hope it will look)-- because Castiel's story <i>can't</i> be finished yet, and Dean simply <i>can't</i> be truly happy without his best friend by his side.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s been a year—a year since they beat Chuck, a year since Jack walked off into the role of God, a year since the world fell back into its new normal … and so did Sam and Dean. They still hunted—there were still monsters out there, not as many, but <em>some</em>; and at first, Dean would look up at the sky and ask “Why?” but Jack didn’t answer him, so eventually he figured the kid had good reason. Maybe there’s some cosmic balance he wasn’t aware of—maybe monsters play their role in the fate of the world as much as he does … or <em>did</em>. A new apocalypse doesn’t seem to be on the horizon, so for the first time in his whole life, Dean feels like he might not have to be <em>important</em> to the world. He can just be important to his people… what’s left of them anyway.</p><p>Sam and Eileen moved in together. They don’t live far, but it’s still weird for Dean not to be able to call out to his brother and have him walk down the hall a second later. Dean stayed behind in the bunker. Sam didn’t understand why he wanted to stay there after everything that’s happened, but it’s his home, and in spite of all the memories of pain and death, he has found a comfort in the routine there that still feels too precious to risk—so he spends his days mostly alone. Sometimes Donna or Jody will pop by with the girls. Claire will call him an old, crusty hermit, and he can’t really argue with her, but he tries anyway. Bobby and Charlie stop in between hunts and occasionally ask Dean to work some cases; and Sam and Eileen stay over every so often, and when they do--- Dean feels almost normal again … <em>almost</em>. Because no matter how many times he sees Sam walking around in the bunker, hair longer than ever, reading books and acting like his old nerdy self, and no matter how much he still feels Jack around him<em> everywhere</em>, Dean knows that one of them is still missing. One of them didn’t come back when everyone else did. One of them … a really special one of them, got swallowed up amidst their final war and for some reason, Jack didn’t bring him back like Dean thought he would. He could get over there still being monsters, and people still dying because of them—because he knew that tragedy and pain had to be a part of life to make the good—<em>good</em>; but Castiel meant something to Jack too. Castiel was like a father to him … he basically <em>was</em> Jack's father considering the real one was the literal devil. How could Jack not make things right and bring him back? How could he just leave him in the Empty? Dean prayed and he questioned and he even researched ways to summon him just to ask those questions, just to understand the reasoning because from where he’s been sitting for the last year, it was a painful and harsh oversight on behalf of the new God.</p><p>But then Sam said something during this last visit that changed everything within Dean’s perspective:</p><p>“What if Cas <em>isn’t</em> in the Empty anymore, Dean?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>Sam furrowed his brow—the way he always did when trying to peace together all his deep thoughts. “What if Jack <em>did</em> spring Cas from the Empty, but he just didn’t bring him back to Earth.”</p><p>That caused Dean to furrow his brow too, but it was out of confusion more than anything else. “I’m not following.”</p><p>Sam huffed a little and then gave him a crooked smile. “Look—all this time, you’ve been getting angrier and angrier with Jack, thinking that he’s forgotten about the only real father he’s ever had; but, we haven’t actually <em>seen</em> or <em>heard</em> from Jack since he walked away that day. I mean, we know he’s around, we can all sense it, but we don’t actually know what he’s been up to … and since he’s the new God, he could literally be up to anything, in any dimension, in any timeframe. He could be off creating other worlds or revamping Heaven, and there’s a very real possibility that he got Cas out of the Empty and brought him somewhere else.”</p><p>Something stabbed in Dean’s chest at that. “Why the hell would he bring him somewhere else? His home is <em>here.</em>”</p><p>Sam frowned. “His home <em>was</em> here, Dean. And before that, his home was Heaven.”</p><p>“Cas hated Heaven!” Dean argued.</p><p>“He hated what Heaven turned into” Sam countered.</p><p>“No … no” Dean stood up from his chair and began to pace, “I can’t buy any of that—Jack would know, better than anyone—considering he’s now <em>all-knowing</em> and crap. He would know that if Cas got another chance, he’d want to be <em>here</em>.”</p><p>“But that’s the thing, Dean … I don’t think Cas <em>would</em> get another chance.”</p><p>Dean stopped mid pace to glare daggers at his little brother. “If anyone—and I do mean <em>anyone,</em> deserved a second chance, it was that angel!”</p><p>Sam held up his hands defensively. “Dean, I’m not saying I wouldn’t love to see Cas walk in that door right now. I would be over the moon; but it’s not like he was <em>taken</em> like the others were…”</p><p>“What the hell are you talking about? The Empty literally swallowed him whole! I saw it happen right in front of me!”</p><p>Sam stood up slowly to put himself in front of Dean, like a wall of seriousness he could never hope to pass. “Dean, what I’m saying is …. Cas knew what he was doing, and he made the choice to die. He had control of the deal he made with the Empty, and he knew the consequences fully. He sacrificed himself to save you, and before that—to save Jack. Dying is what he wanted.”</p><p>“No! Screw that! He wanted to be happy! He wanted to be <em>here</em> and happy! Dying was the cruel consequence of that!”</p><p>“<em>Dying</em> finally made him admit that” Sam offered quietly, but Dean had heard enough, and he was already walking away before Sam could finish speaking. “Dean … look, I don’t know okay? I was just telling you what I thought!”</p><p>Dean marched towards the hallway, all too eager to be alone again. “Yeah, well—I didn’t ask you, did I?”</p><p>But even so, Sam’s words stuck with him long after he and Eileen had gone back home. They stuck with him through the night and well into the next morning, and as he sat at the table, sipping his coffee, trying to wake up from his seven hours of no-sleep, what Sam was <em>really</em> trying to say dawned on him.</p><p>
  <em>Cas’s death was on his own terms, therefore—there was nothing for Jack to “fix”.</em>
</p><p>Cas didn’t deserve to have the Empty be his final resting place, of that, Dean’s sure … but Jack could’ve easily gotten him out and brought him up to his own personal heaven. Somewhere that he could rest peacefully, surrounded by all the things he loves.</p><p>
  <em>But … he loves me.</em>
</p><p>The thought wasn’t new; in fact, Dean has thought it about a trillion times since he saw Castiel get taken away from him.</p><p><em>He loves me</em>.</p><p>But now, it doesn’t feel like it had much to do with him at all. <em>Cas</em> loved Dean—Cas <em>loved.</em> Those were the <em>angel’s</em> emotions, that was the angel’s life, the angel’s accomplishment, and Dean suddenly just feels very lucky to have been a part of it. He sighs into the steam of his coffee. “He loved me” he whispers to himself, weighed down with the new finality. He <em>loved</em> … <em>past tense,</em> as in—he is no longer a living being capable of loving. Dean closes his eyes, setting his coffee down so he can fold his hands in front of him and rest his head on the table.</p><p>Castiel had lived and he had loved, and in spite of all the time that has passed since it happened, Dean finally tells himself that the angel is <em>really, truly</em> <em>gone</em>, and he knows he needs to find peace with that.</p><p>“Goodbye, Castiel” he says, feeling his eyes begin to brim with tears. “I loved you too.”</p><p>“Hello.”</p><p>Dean jumps back, tumbling off the stool and instinctively reaching for the knife he no longer hides in his pocket.</p><p>Jack looks down on him with an unphased smile.</p><p>“Jack?” Dean gasps. “What the hell?”</p><p>Jack just continues to look down at him warmly.</p><p>Dean tries to catch his breath as he pulls himself back to his feet, but before he knows it, he’s rushing forward to give the kid a hug.</p><p>Jack stays still for a moment but eventually hugs Dean back, chuckling softly as he does.</p><p>“What are ya doing here, kid?”</p><p>Jack looks around the bunker’s kitchen a moment and then nods to himself, as if impressed it all has remained the same. “You prayed to me, so now I’m here.”</p><p>Dean leans back and squints at him, eventually shaking his head. “But I—I didn’t….”</p><p>“I’m not my grandfather, Dean. I don’t consider praying to only be when someone is on their knees calling out to me. In fact, the times that humans do <em>that</em> … they rarely ever <em>actually</em> need my help.”</p><p>Dean’s head is swimming. Between his and Sam’s conversation yesterday, to not sleeping at all last night, to <em>this</em>, he feels like he’s living in a fever-dream. “I don’t under—”</p><p>“You realized something just now, Dean. You realized that Castiel was <em>more</em> than just the moment you lost him.”</p><p>Dean huffs—offended and instantly defensive, and still very, very confused. “What? I’ve always known—”</p><p>“You’ve known that he was your best friend for years, and you’ve known that he was important to you and someone you could always depend on; but not until just now did you know nor accept that he was someone capable of making choices that <em>you</em> couldn’t make yourself.”</p><p>Dean opens his mouth to argue, but quickly finds he has no idea what to say, so he slowly lowers himself back into his seat to stare blankly into the distance.</p><p>Jack sits down too, and it finally pulls Dean’s focus. Jack smiles again. “Sam was right. I didn’t leave Castiel in the Empty.”</p><p>Dean’s heart quickens. “Y—you didn’t?”</p><p>Jack shakes his head. “No, but I didn’t bring him to Heaven either.”</p><p>“Then … where did you—”</p><p>“He’s with me.”</p><p>Dean bolts to his feet again, staring down at the ever-peaceful-Jack, feeling anything <em>but</em> at peace himself. “What?” Dean yelps.</p><p>“He’s <em>with</em> me, Dean—like Amara is with me, like how all the people and beings who have died or moved on from existence are with me now.”</p><p>Dean feels more confused than ever, and Jack knows it.</p><p>“Sit down, Dean.”</p><p>Dean follows the direction, feeling all the fight left in him slowly drain away.</p><p>Jack sighs and then reaches out to put a calming hand on Dean’s wrist. “Dean … there is no more Heaven. There is no more Hell. The Empty is at peace, asleep just as it wanted, and anything that ever <em>was</em> or had been is now with me. They are at rest and their souls are light, and they help me move forward with helping the living begin to heal from all the damage my grandfather has done. We are all one now—I am them, they are me.”</p><p>“So … he’s …” Dean doesn’t know what to think anymore. He doesn’t know what to say. He loves the idea that Heaven and Hell and the Empty are basically no-more, but this makes death so much more real to him, so <em>final</em>. At least those were places he could go to if he tried hard enough (and Lord, has he <em>tried</em> over this last year). Part of him always thought that he could someday find a way to see Castiel again, as well as all the others he’s loved and lost, but if everyone’s soul just merges into one now, that means the individual is truly gone, <em>right?</em></p><p>“Dean … he isn’t gone. He isn’t dead, just as he isn’t alive. He just <em>is</em> and as I do with everyone else that I carry with me, I ask him what he wants from moment to moment. Mostly, he wants to see you, he wants to see you alive and living on your own terms, because that is what he sacrificed himself for; so, when you feel me here with you, it’s because you are feeling <em>him</em> <em>wanting</em> to be here with you. You have never been alone, Dean. Not once this past year. Castiel has been here.”</p><p>Dean feels like a can’t breathe, while also feeling like he’s finally exhaling all the anxiety he’s been holding onto about all this. “Okay—okay, so what does that mean then? Why now? Why are you here <em>now?</em>”</p><p>“Because” Jack begins matter-of-factly, “you finally accepted this new life.”</p><p>Dean chokes on words, but none of them come out.</p><p>Jack smiles. “In accepting Cas’s death, his sacrifice, you’ve finally accepted this existence. You’ve finally stopped fighting, Dean; and since you’ve stopped, your soul can truly open, and I needed that in order to restore the balance.”</p><p>“B-balance?”</p><p>“This life is all about balance—and when you let go of the added-darkness in your soul just now, new light could finally be let in; and in spite of what most believe, I am not ‘all-powerful’, Dean. I can only work between the weight of life and death, which is what I’ve been doing this last year … trying to inch both sides of the scale back into place.”</p><p>“So…” Dean is terrified of the little seed of hope that is now blooming in his chest, “so, what exactly are you saying right now?”</p><p>Jack breathes out a small laugh, “What I’m saying is simple: now that you’ve let go of your anger, I can finally make things right; and Castiel is very happy that you’re finally ready.”</p><p>Dean’s heart leaps into his throat. “Can … can I talk to him?” he yelps, too eager and nerves too raw to try and toughen up his emotions. “Can you just like—bring him out or something?”</p><p>Jack smiles, glancing down at the table while staying quiet for a moment. “You know” he says finally, eyes shining amber in the yellow lights of the kitchen, “it’s funny—he just asked me the exact same thing.”</p><p>“<em>Dean</em>.”</p><p>Dean looks over to the doorway, head spinning as the angel smiles down at him. “C—Cas?”</p><p>Cas gasps out a laugh as his eyes well up with tears.</p><p>Dean stands up slowly, afraid that if he moves too fast, he might scare this miracle away. “Cas—are you really here right now?”</p><p>The angel grins as he looks over to Jack, and Jack smiles back at him—eventually giving him a slow nod before disappearing in a soft haze of light.</p><p>Dean blinks a few times, already crying and terrified that each time he opens his eyes again, Cas would disappear too; but he doesn’t. He’s still there, solid, real and standing in front of him, and Dean can’t hold himself back anymore.</p><p>“Dean – I” but Dean is kissing him before Castiel can say another word.</p><p>And it doesn’t feel like the first time they’ve done this. Dean is surprised by that—in the moments he can think about anything other than how good it feels to have Castiel in his arms again. He thought that this might feel electric and intoxicating like it had with the others he’s cared for in the past; but it doesn’t. It feels <em>better</em>. It feels like home.</p><p>“I love you too, Cas. I’m sorry I didn’t say it that day. I should’ve—I shouldn’t have let you go without telling you.”</p><p>Castiel stares at him, eyes wide with love and wonder, and he breathes out like he’s been holding it in just as long as Dean has. “Dean…” he says, shaking his head in awe, “I never wanted to leave you, all I wanted was for you to be okay. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”</p><p>“There is no version of me out there that will ever be okay without <em>you</em>.”</p><p>Castiel gasps on his sob, but Dean catches his breath with his lips again, holding him close and holding him tight, finally feeling that balance that Jack was talking about.</p><p>He is finally feeling the peace within this new life—and that peace comes with blue eyes and a deep voice, and a love and faith that Dean never knew he needed. That peace is his everything, and he will spend the rest of his days knowing it to be true.</p><p>Castiel is here, Castiel is home, Castiel just <em>is</em>—and for once, Dean truly feels excited for the future.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
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